I recently travelled to Thailand with Korey Barrett. You might know Korey from the midnightshift.  It was my first real visit to Thailand – I had transited through on a Qantas flight to London some years ago and all I remember to be honest is that it was hot.

We went for a two-week break and we decided the day the Government suggested that all Australians leave the country due to trouble with the ‘red shirts’. I figured Bangkok was a big city, and the chance of actually seeing any trouble was almost zero.

We arrived at midnight and went directly to our hotel, The Malaysian. It was clean, friendly and very conveniently located to central Bangkok’s gay bays. Babylon Sauna was a short stroll just around the corner. For $30 Australian a night it was perfect for our first three nights.

We visited a number of gay bars and go go bars while in Bangkok. A good place to start an evening is the Telephone Bar – as the name suggests every table has a phone so you can ring other tables. It saves walking over to try and pick up the patron across the room. After the Telephone Bar we headed off to a go go bar called Tawan Bar. You know how it is, when in rome – and really if you haven’t been to one you should at least see one in your life.  Tawan is full of muscle guys, and they do live, and yes safe, shows on stage. I remember saying while there, “I think I have actually seen something that shocked me.”

After the three nights we headed down the coast to beachside Pattaya – well Jomtien to be precise – for the rest of our break.  We went from the hustle and bustle of the big city to the hustle and bustle of a smaller city. Pattaya is Thailand’s third largest economic area and I think there could even be more to do there than in Bangkok.

BoysBoysBoys is a must. It’s bar – a gogo bar – and has lady boy shows nightly and is almost as legendary as Tiffany’s, self-proclaimed as the original transvestite show.  Tiffany’s has shows three times a day each running for a full 90 minutes, and it has to be on your must-do list. It’s been running for 30 years and has in excess of 100 performers, lady boys and boys, and the stage sets just leave other productions in the dark.

Jomtien, a former rice paddy by all accounts, just around the southern headland of Pattaya, has the only ‘gay beach’ in Thailand, Dongtan Beach.  The beach is covered in deck chairs and  they will cater to your every need, from a foot massage, drinks and lunch, through to temporary tattoos, leather goods and DVDs. There’s no need to go anywhere else – this is a one-stop shop and it all comes to you without leaving the comfort of your deck chair.

Jomtein also has a selection of its own small gay bars should you not wish to spend the 10bht (40 cents Australian) on the bus – well they call it a bus, more a ute with seats in the back to go to Pattaya.

I think its fair to say that I am now an official Thai convert. The food is fantastic, and the people are the nicest I have come across. Considering there is no social security in Thailand, everyone has a purpose and works so they can survive, but at the end of the day they do rely of tourism heavily. And with a number of setbacks including the tsunami and violence recently, visitor numbers are down and these lovely people in this beautiful country are hurting, and would welcome you with open arms and show you one of the best vacations you have ever had.

As Mr Schwarzenegger would say “I’ll be back” – and would love to see you there.

Malaysia Hotel

Babylon Sauna

Telephone Bar

BoysBoysBoys

Tiffany’s

Tawan Gogo

Dreamboy GoGo

MBK (for shopping)

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